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The force I don’t control…

December 30, 2011

Each year during the short three day span between December 30th and January 1st , it happens. I’m never sure exactly when it will occur, but it always does.  After all these years, you’d think that I should simply schedule the day and time, but that wouldn’t work. The timing must be just right and that just right condition of day and time seems to be determined by a force I don’t control. So, I wait.

This year the timing was just right this morning – Friday, December 30th, 2011 at 7:38am!

I was alone in the kitchen. Having poured a second cup of coffee, I walked casually across the room. Intending to gaze out the window and organize my thoughts for the day ahead, but my plan was abruptly abandoned by that force I don’t control. It was time.

I reached up and removed the tack that held the calendar to the wall these past 12 months. Filled with scribbled notes marking birthdays, hair appointments, my travel schedule for work, 5K’s for which I was the designated family spectator cheering the kids on, “to do’s” and reminders of all kinds – some with exclamation points clearly intended to convey exciting plans or events, I flipped through the months – remembering.  

There were some really nice memories that I enjoyed revisiting. There were also notes on days that I connected with less pleasant times. It was as though it was all happening again. The totality of another year summed up in a well worn calendar that provided a timeline for my successes, losses, accomplishments and failures during the year.

It is the reading of this calendar each year that allows me to relive my successes, grieve over my losses, take pride in my accomplishments and acknowledge my failures. It is a moment of pause before the next leg of the journey.

But the journey continues and there is no clearer symbol for me than raising the new calendar to the wall to begin its work of collecting the scribbled notes of events yet to come.

So it is done. The 2012 calendar is in place. I have moved through the transition from one year to the next. And I am now prepared to chronicle another year on life’s journey.

I look forward to taking the journey with you…

Happy New Year!

Susan

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